Observation Before Story
Distinguish concrete observations from evaluations before starting a hard conversation.
Observation is camera language, not courtroom language. NVC begins with observation because people rarely hear our needs when they are busy fighting our interpretation. When we say, "You were dismissive," we believe we are naming a problem. The listener usually hears a character verdict. Their attention shifts from the issue to self-protection. What counts as an observation A usable observation is anchored in time, place, and behavior. It sounds like: "In Tuesday's planning meeting, you answered Omar's question and moved to the next topic before I finished my sentence." That wording is specific enough that both people can look at…
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